wavewalker | ONE // Making friends and influencing people already

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ONE // Making friends and influencing people already

[ There's a clatter as the phone is knocked off the hook, followed by the sounds of drawers being opened and their contents being sifted through. There's some unhappy muttering, but otherwise the perpetrator of said rummaging is quiet.

Until he is interrupted by a female shriek: ]

Eek!

-! I'm terribly sorry, madam. Is this your home? I appear to have been robbed and--

No! Bad! Get out of there this instant!

I beg your pardon?

Who even let you in the house? I keep telling the children, pets belong outside. Come on.

I let myself in-- pet? I'm no one's pet. Least of all- unhand me this instant. [ there's a snarl that's not quite human, and the sounds of a brief struggle, followed by a THWAP ] What- that was highly unnecessary!

Go on! Outside! I said go! [ silence for a beat, and then the drone woman retreats, calling for her husband to take care of the "filthy animal" in the bedroom ]

What... just happened?

[ The lone resident of 754 Partridge Drive might indeed find something... interesting in the bedroom, if he so chooses to look. ]

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[If only life were so easy. In fact, while his drone wife was yelling for him to come and chase the animal out of the bedroom, Cyuss was in the bedroom. In the closet, actually, since it's the only place his kids don't come looking for him.

It's freaky, actually, since his house was almost destroyed a few days ago. Man, he hates this family. And this place. He eventually opens the closet door, though, looking around. Why, yes, he's shirtless, who needs clothes? It's his "home" anyways.]

Damn it, what's she cawing about now--hey, what do you think you're doing?! What...the hell? [He sounds more confused than pissed, but seriously. What is this.]

[ For his own part, Ian is at least wearing a pair of pants. They're clearly too big for him, and he had to tear a hole in them for his tail. He's got a shirt halfway over his head when Cyuss addresses him, and he tugs the it the rest of the way down indignantly. ]

What does it look like I'm doing?

You're green and you're stealing my clothes!

[That makes sense, right?]

And what're you doing in my house?

You're tan and living in a closet. Your point?

[ flat look, but at least this guy acknowledges the fact that he can speak ]

I woke up here.

Did you see that woman?! She thinks we're married! She's nuts!

[In fact, if his pet looks around, all of the photos of him and his kids? There are objects strategically placed to cover his own face, like a bookmark or a candle. It makes him freak out.]

...wait, so, you're...new to Mayfield, then?

I did! I saw her quite clearly when she hit me in the face with a rolled paper.

[ crosses his arms over his chest ]

If this place is "Mayfield", yes, I'm quite new.

Dammit. Guess that means I have to explain it to you.

[He scratches the back of his head.]

So, what are you exactly?

If you don't mind.

[ his tail twitches irritably ] I'm a Raptori.

[Oh, hey, he notices that! Unfair!]

Wait, they let you keep your tail and stripes? They took mine away, those bastards! This place really pisses me off!

They did- whoever they are- but they were kind enough to take my clothes, my weapon, and my dignity, and give me this. [ he tosses something on the floor- it's a collar, with his first name and address on the tag ]

I'm going to be frank- I'm annoyed. I don't know where I am or how I got here, and if you're going to explain what's going on, please do so before we both die of old age.

Daaaaamn, that's pretty...much the same with me, actually. Huh.

[He looks at the nametag. It's upside down to him, so it kind of looks like u-a-l. What kind of name is that?]

Uh...so, apparently, this place...you wake up here, and your shit is gone, and people think you're related to them. [...] I think you're supposed to be my pet. Huh. Oh, and don't drink the tea.

[Congratulations, Ian. You just became the pet of the person with the worst explanation for this place ever. He still freaks out when a car goes by.]

[ This look? You're getting it. ] That was not helpful at all.

Yeah? Well...the world pulls people here, apparently. It's not where you're from, and you're never going home. Oh, and if you want your stuff back, you have to go to the post office and trade a few fingers for it.

That better?

Much better, thank you.

.... Do you have a name?

Cyuss Warren. And, uh, no matter what they say, those freaks aren't related to me. Not the crazy chick, and not the little monsters who want me to do math homework with them.

This place honestly makes people think they're related to people they're not related to?

I don't get it, either, but people here call 'em drones because they act weird. People like me, we're not drones. Still don't know much more than that myself.

"Weird" doesn't even begin to cover it.

[ a pause, and he offers Cyuss a hand ] Ian Wavewalker.

...I've only been here a few weeks. Had a bunch of people running around killing other people, but this place still rubs me the wrong way.

[FIRM. MANLY. HANDSHAKE.]

[ MANLY HANDSHAKE ACTIVATE ]

... What's all this about people killing who now?

Hey. Your, uh, hands feel pretty...interesting. And can't really tell you all that. People use that thing, the telephone...[He gestures at the one in the bedroom.]...to talk to others, but I don't really get a lot of time for that. I have a stupid job and my family is full of freaks.

[ raaaaises an eyebrow, and grins ] You've never met a Raptori before, hm?

Nope. Not used to meeting lizards. Doubt you're even from my world, though.

That, among other things, is going to take some getting used to.

Where are you from, anyway?

Ever hear of Astral City?

Can't say I have.

That's what they kept saying. We're from different worlds. You probably don't even know what a Highlander is, huh.

I'd say I know what a Highlander is as much as you know what a Raptori is.

See? You're getting the hang of it! So, uh. Welcome, I guess.

I like to think I'm a fast learner.

Would you mind terribly if I kept these? [ he motions to the borrowed set of clothes he's wearing ] At least until I can procure my own.

...Don't get me wrong, man. This place is still awful. The booze isn't bad, though.

[He makes a fist and hits his stomach a few times.] Don't sweat it! I don't usually wear that shit unless I have to.

That's good to hear. After the morning I've had, I could use a drink.

[ He chuckles ] I've noticed. I couldn't get my First Mate to wear a shirt if his life depended on it, either.

Your, uh...[He pauses. Sharing drinks might be one thing, but he doesn't hear "First Mate" with capital letters.] first mate? What's that all about?

First Mate? As in the kind you would have on a ship.

Oh! Right! [Awkward. You are some kind of crazy reptile. The assumptions that he makes!] Yeah, so, uh...want me to send the wife to the store or something?

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ONE // Making friends and influencing people already

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